I was just re-reading my previous posts as it has been quite some time since I was here. I realized that I kept ending them right in the middle of a thought. So now that I am back, hoping to post more often, I will also try to finish them!
Yesterday was the start of a new semester, and with it came excitement, trepidation, and hopefulness. Excitement because I love to learn, and I can't wait to embrace the new knowledge these classes will bring (Humanities II and American Government, in case you were curious). Trepidation because I still struggle to get and stay organized, still struggle with procrastination in my school work. Hopefulness because each semester I attend classes, I do a little better with these issues than the previous one, and I am hopeful this is going to be my best semester yet.
The new year has brought new challenges, including a new diagnosis of adult ADHD, although I have likely had it since I was a child. I was uncomfortable receiving yet another diagnosis, especially so late in this process, as I was first diagnosed bi-polar in 2005. But my reality is this: the diagnosis fits and the treatment has helped me SO much. The ADHD explained why even on bi-polar meds, I continued to have mood swings, except happening over hours or minutes, instead of over weeks or months. It explained why no matter how hard I have applied myself, I can't stay organized for very long, and I can't completely eliminate procrastination. And the bigger the project, the worse it is, when I really need it to be the opposite. So after devouring several books by different authors on ADHD, scouring reputable web sites, and just talking to people who know me, I accepted that I have a co-occuring disorder. And went ahead and began treatment, which, for me, includes medication, Omega-3 supplements, and simpler ways of getting organized, ways designed and tested by other ADHD'ers. And it really has made a huge difference.
Like I said earlier, last semester was my best one yet. I only missed a couple deadlines, assignments that eventually I turned in just one class session late, and I stayed relatively organized... at least enough that I only lost one piece of important paperwork. These successes are huge improvements over all my previous semesters, even going back to before my bi-polar diagnosis. So I am proud of myself and the growth I have achieved by keeping my mind open to the reality that there is only one constant in this crazy life of mine, and that is change. Cliche, I know, but it is still true no matter how cheesy it sounds.
And no my bed is calling to me so I will have to write again another day. Thanks for being here with me on this beautiful journey!
